Italian Newly Weds
The newly married Italian couple came home to Brooklyn
from their
honeymoon and moved into the upstairs apartment they'd
rented from the groom's
parents.
That night the father of the groom was awakened from his
deep sleep by
his
wife
nudging him by hitting his stomach with her elbow. "Tony,
listen!" she
whispered.
He listened. Upstairs, the bed was creaking in rhythm.
The wife said, "Come on, Tony!"
So Tony rolled on top of her and screwed her. He was
trying to fall
back to sleep when fifteen minutes later the same
sounds were heard. The wife said, "Tony! Listen to
them! Come on, Tony!"
Once again, Tony got on top of her and screwed her. A
short time later
the bedsprings upstairs began to squeak again. And
again the wife nudged her husband. "Tony, listen!"
At this, Tony leaped from the bed, grabbed a broom and
banged the handle
against
the ceiling as he shouted, "Hey, kids, cut it out! You're
killing your old
man!"
A deaf mute walks into a pharmacy to buy condoms. He has difficulty
communicating with pharmacist, and cannot see condoms on the shelf.
Frustrated, the deaf-mute finally unzips his pants, places his dick on the
counter, and puts down a five-dollar bill next to it.
The pharmacist unzips his pants, does the same as the deaf-mute, and then
picks up both bills and stuffs them in his pocket. Exasperated, the deaf
mute begins to curse the pharmacist wildly in sign language.
"Look," the pharmacist says, "if you can't afford to lose, you shouldn't
bet."
